Off to kindergarten...

Well, the day finally came...Sophie is off to kindergarten! Even as I type that, it seems SOOOOO unreal that I have a child who is old enough to go to school. Wasn't I just dealing with that colicky infant? Didn't she just learn how to roll over? I must have blinked, because Sophie grew up right before my eyes...

Started the day special for her, and she got to "order" her breakfast from "Mama's Restaurant" menu that we use for VERY special days only. She chose a cheese omelet, blueberries and chocolate milk. Breakfast of champions :)

Sophie was so excited for kindergarten and she was literally bouncing off the walls. We got to school early (so we could get a parking spot...the lot fills up SO fast). As we waited up by the office, I could tell Sophie was getting a little bit nervous. She told me she could feel the butterflies in her tummy. When they finally opened the hallway doors to go to the classrooms, she got a very serious look on her face. We got to the door of her classroom and she grabbed my hand, but walked in confidently. She found a place and got right to work on an activity left for them. I did not want to leave! In fact, I was one of "those" parents. I was the last one in the classroom, and only left because I felt awkward being the only one. Saying good-bye to Sophie was hard for me! My precious little girl who has never been NOT at home with me during the days. She only went to pre-school on the days that I worked, so to come home to a house with no Sophie was hard. As you know, I am probably one of THE most sentimental people. I am so excited for Sophie in this new season and I love seeing her joy and excitement, yet my heart just aches for how fast she is growing up.

I couldn't stop looking at the clock all day, and poor Tanner kept reminding me of Sophie's absence, "Where Sophie go?" He came up to me once at a teary moment and said, "Mommy no sad, Sophie kindergarten." Precious boy.

When we went to go pick Sophie up, we were greeted with a very excited little girl who had a fantastic first day. Couldn't stop talking all about the 3 recesses, the fun new friends she made, eating lunch in the cafeteria, and of course, snack time. When daddy got home, we celebrated her first day with ice cream at McDonalds.

I'm so proud of Sophie and LOVE that she loves learning so much. I hope that this spark she has in her won't go out and she will always have this love for learning.






Standing outside her new school


Walking down to her class


Can you tell she is getting shy here?? Outside of her classroom.


Right to work!

Shaken up...

Something very scary happened tonight and I am feeling really shaken up over it. Writing (or typing) things out always help me process through my emotions and feelings so here I am...

Tonight we were at the lake for a bbq and Jeremy was cooking burgers for us while the kids were eating hot dogs. I still cut up Tanner's hot dogs into bites because he just inhales his food and doesn't chew things up very well. I am busy talking when I feel Tanner's legs kicking the picnic bench and I look over at him and he is choking on his food. I yell for Jeremy, pick Tanner up and hit him on his back pretty hard. Jeremy came running over and did the whole mouth sweep thing and Tanner is just writhing, still not breathing. This went on for awhile until finally after a hard hit on the back, a piece of food came flying out of his mouth. I have never felt as much fear as I felt right then.

Seeing my son struggle to breathe, and in fact not be able to breathe, I felt so helpless as a parent. I just kept saying "Jesus, Jesus, Jesus" and the fear was just so strong. I just held him afterwards as he whimpered and rested his head on my shoulder and just thanked God so much for saving my Tanner.

Being a parent is such a scary thing. I have NEVER felt this scared though. There have been other times as a parent where I have felt fear. Like when Sophie had croup as a baby and struggled with her breathing then. Or when Sophie fell into a pool last summer. But tonight, by far was the scariest moment.

It just made me realize, once again, the reality of the preciousness of life. One moment, Tanner and I are giggling and playing hide and seek behind the trees, and the next minute he is choking and it is not coming out and the feelings of desperation just were consuming me. I am so thankful to the Lord for watching over my precious precious little guy. I know I have to surrender my children to the Lord and trust in His hand to protect them and watch over them all the time...I am so glad He is capable and stronger than me in my own strength.

I love you Tanner Michael...

My Baby is 5

I cannot believe that my little Sophie Jean is 5 years old today. My heart has this ache in it for some reason as I say she is 5, maybe in disbelief that 5 years have gone by so quickly, or even just the reality that she is growing up so quickly. Too quickly for me.

I think back to the early days after Sophie was born. Me, as a first time mom, to a colicky baby. It was a really, really rough time in my life. I felt so incredibly inadequate as a new mom, so lonely for my mom, or really, any support at all, and just not sure that I would ever make it through those post partum days.

Somehow, those first 4 months seem as a dim, dim memory now. Because after those first few months, Sophie became this happy, peaceful, joyful little thing and has filled our home with all of those things. I had 3 years with just her before Tanner came and I am so thankful of all that time with my little buddy.

I look at Sophie now, this little girl, who is blossoming into a young lady all ready, and am so incredibly proud of her. She has such a sensitive and loving heart and is so compassionate to others. She has such a sensitivity to God and spiritual things and I know God has His hand on her life so strongly.

I just am not sure if I am ready for how fast life is going by. Because when I think back to when she was born, 5 years ago, it seems like just yesterday. And I don't want the next 5 years to fly by that fast as well. Tonight at bedtime, I just held Sophie a little while longer, and a little harder because I know that there won't always be the times that she will want me to cuddle her anymore. So for now, before she grows up even quicker, I will hold her a little longer, and a little harder, and be thankful for this precious precious girl who has made me the happiest mom in the world.

I love you Sophie. You have helped heal my heart in so many ways.

Interview

I got this idea from Becky and I had to copy it!

Here is an interview I did with Sophie the other day :)

Interview with Sophie—March 24, 2011—age 4 years, 10 months

1.What is something mom always says to you?
No, you can’t touch that.

2. What makes mom happy?
When I hug you and kiss her.

3. What makes mom sad?
When she doesn’t see me much.

4. How does your mom make you laugh?
When I tickle her 

5. What was your mom like as a child?
Cute

6. How old is your mom?
30

7. How tall is your mom?
TALL…500?

8. What is her favorite thing to do?
To play with us

9. What does your mom do when you're not around?
Go shopping

10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for?
A Movie Star

11. What is your mom really good at?
Tickling

12. What is your mom not very good at?
I don’t know…nothing

13. What does your mom do for her job?
Work at a school and teaches kids who aren’t my age.

14. What is your mom's favorite food?
Shepherd’s pie (I’ve had this once in my life, lol)

15. What makes you proud of your mom?
How she hugs me tight when she gets home.

16. If your mom were a cartoon character, who would she be?
Still mommy

17. What do you and your mom do together?
Shop and go to the park and play games and eat banana bread.

18. How are you and your mom the same?
Same hair and blue eyes and the same skin.

19. How are you and your mom different?
We don’t talk the same. We have different voices.

20. How do you know your mom loves you?
Because she tells me

21. Where is your mom's favorite place to go?
Target

Sophieisms

Got a couple "Sophie sayings" that made me smile today :)

1) Sophie was using the toilet and I suddenly hear her excitedly yell, "Mommy!! I am fitting better on the toilet without having to hold myself up! My bum must be getting bigger! Yay!!!" (all the while I'm thinking, "let's see if you are still cheering about that in 20 years, lol)

2) During prayer last night, Sophie decided to pray for a very special person to "find a husband". Here's her prayer:

" And Lord, I just pray you find ______ a husband NOW. Just take parts of her body and make it into a man. Amen"

Can you tell who had just heard the story about Adam and Eve???

From Sophie's mouth to God's ear

I have to say, there is something about hearing a young child pray with such faith and conviction, that touches my heart! Sophie has become quite the powerful pray-er. Every night before bed, she prays first, and then we do. It's cute to hear the things she says. She always prays for: 1) Something she is thankful for, 2) Something she wants Jesus to help her with, and 3) Someone to pray for. This was her prayer tonight:

"Dear Jesus, I'm thankful that we went to Red Robin and got a balloon. Please help me listen and obey the first time. And talk nice to my friends at preschool tomorrow. I pray for Mommy that you will bless her tomorrow at work. With peace. And strength. And that the kids will listen. I just love you so much Jesus. Come more in my heart and live there. Take away my sin. Amen".

Precious girl...

The Best Valentine's Day

I am so blessed. I have an amazing husband who is so caring and thoughtful. I have an AWESOME daughter who loves to do special things to make me smile. And I have a pretty cool little son who just adds entertainment to whatever we do :)

Jeremy and I went out for a date on Friday night, so really, I wasn't expecting today to be anything too special. I was making a nice dinner at home and just asked Jeremy if he could set the table nice so we could give Sophie a nice candlelight dinner for Valentine's (she was soooo excited for Valentine's day, even though her preschool wasn't doing a party or anything, I wanted to make the day special for her). But pretty lowkey.

However, after a crazy morning in my classroom with my students who were all so EXCITED for their Valentine's festivities we'd have at the end of the day, at lunch time, I locked myself in my classroom to eat lunch alone (how exciting and social of me, huh? I also was doing work.) As I was enjoying the solitude of eating in my quiet classroom, there is a knock at the door. I thought it was one of my students who forgot their lunch (again), so I go to answer the door. But MUCH to my huge surprise, Sophie and Jeremy were standing there with a beautiful bouquet of roses. Oh, I was sooooo happy! Nothing could have been better for me than to have a visit from 2 of my most favorite people in the world. To see my sweet little Sophie (who was still sleeping this morning when I left for work), just rejuvinated me so much. They spent some time with me at lunch, and got to see my students at lunch. I felt soooo proud walking through my school cafeteria with my precious daughter and amazing husband.

So, no matter that I had students melting down or hiding under desks today. No matter that I had colleagues tell me that they have no more support to give me with some of my hard kids, I had the best day ever, why? Because 2 of my favorite peeps came and brightened my day :) Happy Valentine's Day to me.